I think the big driver for gay marriage is that gay families want the government to stop discriminating against them. Certainly there are some poor souls people who want legal sanction because they pathetically confuse it with “approval of the masses”, but for the most part it is a discrimination issue.

On the other hand, I look at Virgina’s hysterically funny attempt to mandate that people discriminate against families who aren’t headed by heterosexual couples, and the fervent support that amendment received tells me that the bulk of the opponents of gay marriage are not interested in letting people be, but are in fact more interested in forcing people who don’t want to discriminate against gay families to discriminate against gay families or face legal sanction.

No, you’re missing the point. You’re right that it’s none of anyone’s business if the gay couple consider themselves “married”. But, the converse is ALSO true. It’s none of the anyone’s business that some other people consider them NOT married. You can’t force people to change their definition of a word.

The real goal of people seeking gay marriage is a desire for approval and legitimacy from the masses. But you can’t legislate approval.

Why? Do you have some god-like powers? Should I be worshipping something with your image graven on it? :)

Yes, but then it’s also none of your business that some other people say they are not married. The meaning of words is a matter of general consensus, and so let democracy decide.

I personally am opposed to gay marriage, so I won’t participate in one. But if the lesbian couple down the street want to call themselves a married couple, it’s no skin off my nose. What they do or call themselves is none of my business.