Administration Declares War On Middle Class Dissatisfaction

…or something like that:

For years, we had a White House that failed to put the middle class front and center in its economic policies.

President Barack Obama has made it clear that is going to change. And it’s why he’s asked me to lead a task force on the middle class.

America’s middle class is hurting. Trillions of dollars in home equity and retirement savings and college savings are gone. And every day, more and more Americans are losing their jobs.

For the backbone of America, it’s insult on top of injury. Over the course of America’s last economic expansion, the middle class participated in very few of the benefits. But now in the midst of this historic economic downturn, the middle class sure is participating in all of the pain. Something is seriously wrong when the economic engine of this nation – the great middle class – is treated this way.

[wipes tear from eye] I feel so, so, so loved! They really do care about me!

Does this mean I’ll get my billion of stimulus money? Because I know in the next few years, I’m going to be paying for it. As Bill Cosby once explained — because they come for the “regular people” first: