The Brits Have Finally Lost It

…why don’t they just make stabbing illegal?

Plans to replace the traditional pint glass with one made of shatter-proof plastic will not be accepted by drinkers, the pub industry has warned.

The Home Office has commissioned a new design, in an attempt to stop glasses being used as weapons.

Official figures show 5,500 people are attacked with glasses and bottles every year in England and Wales.

“There’s going to be quite a push behind this in terms of the Home Office.”

The Home Office Minister, Alan Campbell, said the redesign could make a significant difference to the number of revellers who are injured.

He said: “Innovative design has played an important role in driving down overall crime, including theft, fraud and burglary.

“This project will see those same skills applied to the dangerous and costly issue of alcohol-related crime and I am confident that it will lead to similar successes.”

When I first came across this on Lowering The Bar, I thought it must be false. I thought even the Brits would avoid pushing themselves into a reductio ad absurdum. They were warned about the slippery slope, and responded by saying that slippery slopes are dangerous and it’s a lot safer to be all the way down at the bottom!

Stories like this almost make me feel like my home, California, is free!

  • John222

    Maybe they could make beer mugs and glasses out of tempered glass with plastic sandwiched inside like windshields.

    Failing that, outlawing stabbing sounds like a good way to go. Beer just doesn’t taste the same in plastic.

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  • Quincy

    If the plastic is strong enough to make a glass, a hooligan would almost certainly be able to stomp on it in such a way as to generate a nice, sharp piece of plastic. No amount of innovative drinking vessel design will do away with stupid and drunk.